The Venus and Mercury Cat Blog

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Mercury's Turn



Hello everyone.

As usual, my bratty baby sister has hogged the whole blog so far, but she's busy with one of her little 'projects' so I thought I'd take this opportunity to introduce myself, and correct some of the more egregious falsehoods that Venus has taken the liberty of perpetrating while I was otherwise occupied.

My name is Mercury, although most of my nicknames seem to indicate that I am, shall we say, somewhat corpulent. Nothing could be farther from the truth. I am not overweight; Venus is anorexic. I am a cat who enjoys the finer things in life. I do not spend every minute senselessly dashing hither and yon. I stop to smell the tuna. I lead a Proustian existence, contemplative and reflective.

That is, unless I am attacked by my sister, who misguidedly feels that she needs to goad me into useless and unproductive activity by flinging herself upon me while I am enjoying a well-deserved siesta. I have a rich inner life, which demands a great deal of mental activity, something a pedestrian intellect like Venus's would never understand in a million years.

Speaking of my rich inner life, I do believe that it is time to return to it.

I shall continue to update my acolytes periodically.

Yours most cerebrally, Mercury

posted by Alicia Morgan @ 10:12 AM  

12 Comments:

  • At 6:13 PM, Anonymous Agnes said…

    Dear Mercury,

    I'm sorry about your nicknames. It must be hard on a gentlecat. Your humans surely must know about the intellectual challenge that is The Naming of Cats! T.S. Eliot Catlover did know a thing or two...

    Sincerely, Agnes

     

  • At 6:47 PM, Blogger Alicia said…

    My dear Agnes,

    You sound like a very sympathetic and understanding person. If you only knew how I suffer under the slings and arrows of an inferior intellect. Nonetheless, I comfort myself with the knowledge that, although sadly lacking in brainpower and perception, my family (feline, human, and, yes, even canine) love me in their own crude way.

    Yours philosophically, Mercury

     

  • At 9:26 AM, Anonymous Agnes said…

    Dear Mercury,

    Yes, Love can show the way to Zen, Tao and Tuna. (Cantaloupe in my case.)

    That photo that shows you in deep meditation just reminded me of one of my favourite quotes:

    "But above and beyond there is still one name left over,
    And that is the name that you never will guess;
    The name that no human research can discover ---
    But THE CAT HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.

    When you notice a cat in profound meditation,
    The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
    His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
    Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
    His ineffable effable
    Effanineffable
    Deep and inscrutable singular Name."

    Wishing you pleasant, tuna-scented musings,

    Agnes (who thinks she may try some inscrutability herself)

     

  • At 9:37 AM, Blogger Alicia said…

    My dear Agnes,

    Yes, Mr. Eliot indeed had some glimmer of insight into the feline consciousness. A rare trait.

    Nominally yours, Mercury

     

  • At 10:04 AM, Blogger oldwhitelady said…

    My mom says "Gorgeous Mercury. Beautiful cat."

    But I want you to know, writing all that gentlecattery makes you no different than the rest of us flea-bitten cats. Too, I bet you still get hairballs, just like a regular cat!

    Cotton (signed on using mom's identity)

     

  • At 10:31 AM, Blogger Alicia said…

    Hello Cotton -

    Just because a cat is refined and sophisticated does not mean that he is not 'all cat'. I assure you that I do, indeed claim my share of hairballs and the rest of that he-cat stuff.

    Yours in masculinity, Mercury

     

  • At 11:32 AM, Blogger wanda said…

    Mercury, you are my kind of cat. I too have a rich inner life. It's such a shame that the world has no respect for those of us who are legends in our own minds. Oh shoot who am I kidding, we don't care what the world thinks.
    By the way I love that georgous fur you have. It's the most perfect shade of charcoal grey and appears so soft and silky. Quite lovely indeed!

     

  • At 12:45 PM, Blogger Alicia said…

    My dear Wanda,

    Of course we don't care what the world thinks. It is the world who has to care about what we think.

    Yours in pre-eminence, Mercury

    (or is that éminence grise?)

     

  • At 8:04 AM, Blogger srp said…

    Dear Mercury,

    If you have trouble with your sister, just learn to quietly glare with steely eyes at her. Actually, it works better on those hairy ragdolls better than Chloe.

    Does Venus do the thing where you are sitting there, minding your own business and thinking,"Hey, this sleeping together is warm and we're sisters and I love my ears cleaned" when all of a sudden she bites and smacks at the same time? Where did that come from?

    Oh! And tell your mom that the fattest (19lbs as of last week) ragdoll, Willow, does the pipecleaner thing too...only she prefers red.

    Have a most prosperous rest this week.

    Sincerely,

    Clover

     

  • At 9:45 AM, Blogger Alicia said…

    My dear Clover,

    If you knew my sister, you would know that she is impervious to the subtlety of a glance, no matter how steely. Her soft brown fur conceals the hide of an alligator. I appreciate the suggestion; you perhaps imagine that my sister is as refined and sophisticated as myself. Alas, that is not so.

    And, yes, she does have a penchant for a bite and a swat in the middle of her meddling ministrations, when I am least prepared for them. She is a relentless assailant and I am a most beleaguered and put-upon cat. However, in her own way she can be almost tolerable at times, so I always end up forgiving her. Until, of course, the next time I am waylaid by her.

    Thank you, Clover, for your interest and supportive suggestions. I have seen your photograph and I can tell that you, too are an elegant and cultured cat.

    Yours in commiseration, Mercury

     

  • At 8:52 AM, Blogger The cats, formerly known as CottonSaddieMango said…

    Hey - we came over to tell you that we at least got an id so we can leave comments all over the place. We've managed to get the keys to mom's blog, too, as Venus has noticed. Just wait... we're going to have fun!

     

  • At 9:01 AM, Blogger Alicia said…

    My dear CottonSaddieMango,

    On behalf of the Venus and Mercury Cat Blog, allow me to congratulate you on your foray into the Feline Blogosphere. My sister and I look forward to hearing about your exploits. You sound like intrepid and fearless fellow-travelers.

    Yours in World Domination, Mercury

     

Post a Comment

<< Home